A Tribute to Judy Neugebauer (6/7/48 – 12/8/16)


This is a very sad time for me as I have lost the love of my life, my wife, my best friend and my soul mate. Judy and I were married for 28 years this past August 20th and each and every one of those years was a delight because we were truly lifetime partners. It’s not often that you find that one person that fits with you so perfectly, but she was that one in a million. We worked together for ten years side by side as stock traders and I never remember a harsh word between us in such an intense environment. She always had that calming smile when I would get upset and it only took a glance from her and everything seemed to be ok again. She was like having a real live tranquilizer with no ill side effects. She always had that constant infectious smile and never had a bad word to say about anyone.

She was everything you would want in a life partner. Always being complimentary yet willing to criticize me if I did something outlandish. Seldom were there harsh words between us as we thought so much alike. Many times she would say something while I would be saying the exact same thing back to her. It was like there was a constant connection between us.

Judy loved the children and the grandchildren and there was nothing she wouldn’t do to help them even if it meant she had to do without. She was very proud of all they have achieved and that three of them had already graduated from college, one was in her second year and two were going on for graduate degrees

She loved her cooking and spent many hours in the kitchen preparing the most fantastic meals for us and our friends. I will tell you Martha Stewart had nothing on her when it came to innovational meals for 2 or 20. If you never had an opportunity to sample her cooking you really missed a treat. You could always find her head buried in a new recipe book by one of the chefs on Food Network which she would watch from early in the morning until late afternoon. You could tell how good her cooking was by watching the expansion of my waistline. She especially enjoyed cooking for our dinner club as every time it was our turn to cook she would go through a major production for a week before the dinner, as everything had to be just perfect. The best part was that I got to sample everything beforehand.

Church was also very important to her and unless we were out of town we never missed a service and she so enjoyed Pastor Tom’s sermons but most of all she enjoyed the songs we sang together at the service. She would always comment on the songs that were picked especially when she didn’t particularly like one of them. She would turn and look at me and say, “who do you think picked this one” with a little grimace on her face.

Her other love was singing in the church choir at Easter and Christmas. She took choir very seriously and used to practice every day at home and even in the car as we would be driving from one place to another. Once Linda gave her a CD to practice with that was all she would listen to till we performed. I used to enjoy driving with her singing soprano and me singing the bass parts along to the CD as it really brought us into the holiday spirit. Christmas was a very special time of the year for her and she would spare no effort to make sure that our home was properly decorated and adorned with seasonal flowers, candles and anything she could find that would make the occasion more meaningful.

She was the consummate gardener and we had the most beautiful flowers all summer long due to her hard work and being able to commandeer me as her pack mule to tote things around for her. She had me plant over a dozen rose bushes and she would diligently trim them all summer to get the most blooms she could out of them. She loved flowers and the outdoors and never missed a chance to sit on our patio looking up new recipes, or reading her latest book. She was a voracious reader and could read for hours at a time no matter where we might be, Costco is definitely going to miss here buying a book a week.

She loved to play bridge with the girls even if she didn’t seem to win much because to her it wasn’t about winning but about having fun and enjoying the company of her friends.

I’m going to miss our long walks around the neighborhood with our dog Max and the long drives around Idaho exploring different towns and visiting the many friends we had made through the Tea Party and our newsletter. If it wasn’t for her editing, the newsletter would have been unreadable as I have an affinity for bad grammar and inaccurate spelling but she always gave me an A for content.

We had a life full of travel and excitement whether it was on the ski slopes of Vail, rafting down the Salmon River with friends or snowmobiling in the Rockies. We always enjoyed being together and experiencing new things. Our journey through life and our compatibility was something that people only dream of, and as happy as we made each other her departure from this world will make me equally sad even though I know she is in a better place.

I just want to add one last thing that I think she would want you all to know. Most of you are aware that Judy and I were fighting her cancer with alternative medicine and I want to let everyone know that six weeks ago after a PET scan, CAT scan and blood tests everything showed negative for any cancer and her Doctor called her the miracle girl because of the test results. We were ready to celebrate but knowing how cancer works we were still cautiously optimistic. So what happened? Cancer is such a complex disease it could have been several things. Unbeknown to me Judy stopped two of her protocols. Maybe she was just tired of the regimen after a year or maybe the cancer morphed into a very viral strain. We will never know. In any case, if you should decide to go the alternative route as we did remember that cancer is for life and you must never stop being vigilant and even when the test results are negative you should keep taking your protocols for a long period of time after you’re cleared. We have many in our group of friends who are already dealing with cancer and many who will in the future. Statistics tell us for anyone born in 1960 the lifetime risk of getting cancer is a little more than 50%. So if you decide to do alternative medicine please don’t hesitate to call me for information as we have accumulated an enormous amount of data over the past year and would be happy share what we have learned. I’m also in process of putting together a website on the subject for anyone who needs help in the future.

In closing, I just want to say that Judy lived life to the fullest and was a friend to everyone she met. To know her was to love her and although she is no longer with us in body, she is certainly with us in loving memories. She told me she was ready and would soon be with Jesus and that gives me all the comfort I need.

Thank you for being our friends and may God bless you all.

Join the Discussion